Halsey’s VMAs Prep Made Her Lupus Flare Up. She’s Still Learning to Work While Chronically Sick

For two years, Halsey managed to keep their dual diagnosis of lupus and a rare T-cell lymphoproliferative disorder a secret from their audience. During that time, they performed more than a dozen concerts — including festival appearances and a live string ensemble tour— while undergoing treatment. Her latest album, The Great Impersonator, details the impact her illness had on her perceptions of mortality, motherhood, and her positioning as a public figure. But as she makes a full-time return to the music industry, Halsey is still grappling with learning how to work while being chronically ill.

During an appearance on Call Her Daddy, the musician revealed they experienced a lupus flare-up set off by the strain of their rehearsals for the 2024 MTV Video Music Awards. Halsey performed their single “Ego” for the show. In hindsight, there was a hint of irony in them singing, “I’m really not as happy as I seem,” while navigating extensive medical concerns behind the scenes. “I hadn’t had one in a little while because my disease has been in remission,” Halsey said. “I went and did the VMAs, I worked really hard that whole week, and then I had a flare as a consequence of that. That’s reality. That’s the risk. And you guys — the fans — you’re the reward. And I have to kind of balance that every time I do something.”

Halsey’s new normal isn’t lightyears away from her previous one. Throughout her career, the singer and songwriter has candidly discussed her experience having endometriosis and living with bipolar disorder, among other physical and mental health diagnoses. “I did the thing where I was like, I’m feeling so good, I don’t know if I need treatment anymore,” Halsey said. “And so I was like, I’m going to stop treatment. I don’t want to put this stuff in my body. I’m going to be fine. I also always like, bitch, you didn’t learn your lesson. You did that with antidepressants.” Still, she decided to pause treatment and shift her focus toward sticking to a consistent diet instead.

“I skipped a treatment — immediate flare,” she added. “I was on the flight home, and one of the first signs of a lupus flare is you get this butterfly-shaped rash across your cheeks. I got up to go use the restroom on the plane. I looked in the mirror, and I was like, fuck, you’ve got to be fucking kidding me. I like the walk of shame back to my seat, like, sat down, and was like, damn. That was a sad moment for me because I had felt so good. I was like on TV and on the carpet and I was like, I’m doing it again. I’m great, and everything’s good. And it made me emotional because I was kind of like, I’m still sick. That’s still reality. This is forever now.”

Halsey has been performing a string of album release shows in support of The Great Impersonator. On the first night of the run, at Brooklyn Paramount in New York, they teased an upcoming tour that would take them on the road for long stretches of time. On Call Her Daddy, she explained: “The big thing that kept coming up when I got sick was a lot of people in the medical field were pretty adamant with me, like you’re sick because of your job.” Even with the complications of navigating her career while being chronically sick, Halsey emphasized during the show that she struggled with the thought of not being able to perform again when her illness was at its worst.