Prior to the release of the statement by the frontman for the veteran New Jersey group, the Instagram account ‘your.bandsucks‘ uploaded several screenshots to a Story Highlight, documenting instances of abuse, harassment and allegations of sexual misconduct.
The instances of abuse are said to have taken place between March and December of 2020. In the Story Highlight, screenshots of message exchanges, frantic series of missed calls (often times placed just minutes apart), accusations of unsolicited nude photos and blatant admissions of submission of nude photographs by Conley himself.
Also present are messages in which the frontman sent screenshots of countdown timers, indicating how long it would be before another call would be placed.
The recipient of these messages repeatedly asked Conley to disengage in communication. “Please leave me alone man that was unbearable,” read one reply and another said, “Just stop man,” both of which were met with a follow-up message from Saves the Day frontman, one being a selfie photo.
In his official response following the emergence of these photos and accusations, Conley took responsibility for many of these actions, which he said were “greatly mishandled” while also detailing his struggles with his own sobriety and inability to manage his emotions.
Conley’s full statement reads as follows:
I’m writing this statement to address the recent story about me and how I greatly mishandled a relationship with an old friend. I wildly misjudged the dynamic between us, and I lost control of my ability to communicate and interact in a healthy manner due to my alcoholism and many errors in judgement. I mistook what I thought were genuine cues to engage in intimacy from afar and I instigated a weeks-long, long-distance affair. When it became toxic, I was unable to pull myself from its grasp and I spiraled, losing my mind along the way and making an unacceptable number of inappropriate missteps causing irreversible harm. I am truly ashamed and embarrassed by my abhorrent behavior. And I am sorry.
This behavior does not reflect the level of character I have strived to uphold throughout my career and in my relationships, and I take full accountability for my actions. I will not attempt to hide from the truth or to spin the story. All of this happened, and there are pictures to prove it. I would however like to clarify that some of the images you may have seen were altered to paint a certain picture of me and I am particularly troubled by the ‘grooming’ claims, which do not reflect the true nature of the relationship as toxic as it was in other regards. That being said, what is true is damning enough, and I cannot pretend to expect to be forgiven or hope to recover from this. The damage is done, and it is my fault.
I have been emotionally unstable my entire life and I sometimes wrestle with severe anger management issues. Suffering from depression for decades drove me to drink to a dangerous degree, and I struggle daily to maintain my sobriety but continue to fail. None of this excuses my insensitivity or careless conduct, and it is shockingly clear to me now how obviously oblivious I was. My inability to process my emotions in a healthy manner and my failure to address my own personal problems made life miserable for someone whom I have cared about.
I wish I had taken the critical steps I needed to correct the course of my life a million years ago, but I did not. I will do everything possible to make healthy improvements moving forward. I know I have let some of you down, but I am grateful for the moments of joy we were fortunate enough to share over the last 24 years. I wish you all nothing but the best while I work towards the changes necessary to improve my behavior and, more importantly, improve how I interact with those around me.
Equal Vision, the record label that released the band’s last two albums, Saves the Day (2013) and 9 (2018), shared Conley’s statement as well, with a message of their own which reads, “Equal Vision Records take allegations of this nature very seriously. We are working diligently to uncover the truth behind what happened and our actions moving forward will reflect what we are able to find. In the meantime, we refer you to Chris Conley’s statement provided below.
View the posts by Saves the Day and Equal Vision below.
If you or someone you know has been sexually assaulted, resources are available for help. Visit the RAINN website (Rape, Abuse, and Incest National Network) or dial 800-656-HOPE (800-656-4673).